Footprints along the shores of time
Fleeting imprints etched in its sands
Full of vigor and joys so sublime
Dissolved in the wake of unseen hands
-CO.sg

Love my feet...

Love my teeth...

Love my hair !!!

Day 294 (Wednesday 24th January 2007): It was my second day of school today. I love it. The teachers are so kind and caring. I get to spend the whole morning, three times a week, playing with so many other kids and being cared for so tenderly by my teachers. I could get used to this.

The day usually starts with papa dropping me off at 8.30am in the morning. There I get greeted with a huge hug and a beautiful smile by my teacher, Miss Sunshine. I get my temperature taken at the entrance to the school to make sure I don't have a fever before I go in. Then it's usually straight to the playground if the weather is good. There I get to play in a large outdoor, rubberised playground with lots of colourful toys and swings, with all the other kids. On other days we go indoors to play with songs, words and numbers. All this is usually followed by a hearty breakfast. Then its more physical activity, singing nursery rhymes and what they call 'active learning'. By late morning, I am usually feeling tired, so I get to nap for about an hour. After which I am then fed my lunch, and get to play a little more before I have to go home by 1pm. My teachers say I am 'co-operative and adaptable', whatever that means. I just know I enjoy the company of all these people around me.

Papa is glad that things have worked out well for me in school. Mummy, I wish you could see me now. You would be so proud of me. I miss you so much mummy. Love you always.

"My Christmas wish came true..."

"Vee and me..."

"I don't know why I have become the butt of all the froggy jokes lately...."

Day 289 (Friday 19th January 2007): I have started cutting my two front teeth in my lower jaw. They feel funny. To papa, they are the two most beautiful teeth in the world.

My buddy Vee Shen celebrated his very first birthday last Sunday. There was a nice party with a huge ice-cream cake to boot. My Aunty Prisca also celebrated her birthday on Wednesday. I wish them all a very happy birthday.

Papa says that I will be starting school soon. He is sending me to an infant care school for three half days in the week. He hopes that these morning sessions will provide me with some quality stimulation while he is at work. It is only a start. If I like it, then he may increase the time I spend in the school. I am really looking forward to meeting all the other kids. The only thing papa is not looking forward to, is the waking up earlier bit. But he will learn to live with it with a thousand yawns. Let's hope I make some good friends there to make it all worth his while.

My first Bungee jump!
(the reason why papa calls me the youngest 'crash-test-dummy')

I start off by first limbering up, stretching those muscles, and working myself up to a frenzy by shouting myself on. Then when I know I have the camera's attention......*whooopeee*

I'm lying here, and I know the night must fall,
The edge of darkness is so near,
So hold back the night, hold back the night,
It's darkness that I fear
And in my heart there's not a shadow of a doubt
The final truth waits there for me,
There's no where to hide, no where to hide,
From the memories we had together.

These Todays alone mean nothing anymore,
Give me one more Tomorrow, one more Tomorrow,
To see what the future had in store,
For another chance to hold you in my arms,
For the loving calm we had been living for,
One more Tomorrow, one more Tomorrow,
To say the things we had always known in our hearts,
To help me through this night that never ends,

Inner voices in the quiet of the night
In the end angry silence calls for me
No time for tears, no time for tears,
To find a way to break free,
Memories keep flooding back,
Drowning me in seas of sorrow,
Hold back the fears, hold back the fears,
For without you, there is no more tomorrow.

-CO.sg, inspired by the song One more Tomorrow, by the Electric Light Orchestra

That's me at 9 days....


And that's me again at 9 months!

Day 282 (Friday, 12th January 2007): I have come a long way, according to papa. I am evolving so fast, papa still can't believe his eyes when he looks back at some of the 'old' photographs of me. At 9 months, papa says that I have become so much bigger in size that he is finding it difficult to carry me around like he used to. My baby-look has been lost forever. I am also more aware of my surroundings. I am no longer satisfied at being the passive observer. Curiosity and a strong will always get the better of me these days. Which can be dangerous sometimes, and very tiring for my care-givers all the time.

We had another physiotherapy session at Mount Alvernia Hospital on Thursday, and the therapist, Sharon, said that I had grown stronger since she last saw me. I am able to crawl better and sit up with more confidence. I still need to work hard on gaining my balance though. Papa is quietly confident that I will get there eventually, although he knows all too well that anything can happen.

Papa has been thinking about moving back to our own home sometime soon. The transition will not be easy, but is inevitable. He has been very grateful to my Uncle Douglas and Aunty Elena for their generosity. If not for their love and support these last nine months, papa would have been devastated. He will look back at the times spent with them as a time of strengthened bonds. Papa never really had the time before to get to know Aunty Elena and my cousins Timothy and Andrew very well. These last nine months have brought intimacy and a closeness that would never have otherwise existed. This has been one of the few rays of light piercing through the thick dark clouds that have enveloped us. The time has come to move on and confront the past before we can look again to the future. Whatever little that is left of it. The loving memories of mummy still burn deep within papa's heart. A fire that will never be extinguished. Not even by time. We all love and miss mummy very much.

Day 274 (Thursday 4th January 2007): I spent the entire day with papa today. He took me to see Dr Simon for my nine-month review. I weigh 7.55kg and am now 72cm tall! Papa says that Dr Simon was 'guardedly optimistic' about my progress. He said that intellectually I seemed to be doing well but was still lagging slightly on my physical motor-skills. He didn't seem too concerned as he thought that it was still too early to conclude anything. So the outcome of today's review was encouraging, but largely neutral.

Papa took me to the zoo with my cousin Andrew today. It was a hot humid afternoon, but we did enjoy ourselves very much. I was much more alert than on my previous trips and very curious about all those strange-looking, smelly animals than ever before. I was given my very first taste of something nice and sweet after our little adventure- papa gave me a lick of his cold mango sorbet. It was nice!

Water and I don't mix well...

If you were lost, how would I find you,
what path take along dark streets, through
damp vaults, how untangle those choices
far underground, those myriad voices?

If I were gone, you could no longer follow
through great spillways, or deep hollows.
In that world, my footsteps would fade,
there would be no echo, no light or shade.

Still, somewhere your presence ahead
would call, through realms of the dead,
through time imploded and turned back,
platform deserted, abandoned track.

No pause in this long pursuit, this seeking
that has no end. Neither of us speaking,
or able to break the spell—neither chase
nor surrender. Only the lost, familiar face.

- Jared Carter, Laodamia to Protesilaus, from The Raintown Review