Day 29 (Thu 4th May 2006): Today I went to see Dr Phua. He's a "paediatric neurologist". He is helping Dr Simon take care of me. Dr Phua said that I was progressing well and that everything was stable so far. I weighed in at slightly more than 3.9kg! He did caution Papa that it was still early days, and that only time can tell if I had suffered during my birth. It could take up to two years for them to get a clearer picture. Papa was happy nonetheless. He said that no news is good news. Meanwhile we must all continue to pray hard. He said that I had my work cut out for me. I needed to fight harder to get better.

Papa said that as the days go by, he will tell me more about my mummy. Who she was, what she liked and how very much she had achieved in her short journey on this earth. He said that she was one-of-a-kind, an angel that deserved to be remembered for eternity. Someone too good to be true. Papa says that mummy was so looking forward to holding me in her arms. Someone she could finally call her own. Many people have told Papa that while I was growing in mummy's tummy, she looked radiant. They had never seen her happier. Why God has chosen to deny her the joys of motherhood, Papa cannot understand. Papa says, for now, he cannot accept it when others say she would be happier in Heaven. Papa knows that nothing would have made her happier than being on this earth with me. He says he is not sure if he can forgive. He says he will have many craggy mountains to cross and scorching deserts to trudge in his search for answers. Mummy dearest, be the guiding star for Papa in his search for you. Lead us both back to where you are. Promise.